hey ppl.. really enjoyed the session in midvalley.. the whole idea of just sitting together, eating and talking "smart" conversations & catching ups are just awesome.. it really did put away my neurotic mind (due to exam stress overload) away for a moment..
but anyhow, this is not what is this blog all about.. gonna start the first blog of 2006 with my thoughts.. thoughts that start flowing into my already saturated mind as i was driving home, trying to see if i could make it for the fireworks (i couldnt make it coz i end up in my dad's friend's house talking to the aunties about medicine)....
recently, as you guys know, i've been busy preparing for my exams.. trying to squeeze all the medical facts with every possible way into my mind, in hoping that i would be able to recall and remember what i've read... but unfortunately, i failed to do so.. really, although i keep telling myself that "rely on His strength.. trust in Him..." but somehow, i failed to up-live those promises.. i felt ashamed as i myself keep telling my friends that, assuring them of God's unfailing grace, & how He turn the IMPOSSIBLE to POSSIBLE... somehow i felt like a hypocrite... & the drop of sinful desire running in my blood just make me worse.. felt that i nullify the sacrifice that Jesus made on the cross..
as things seem to be out of control, i began to cry out to God... everytime this matter crosses my mind.. seeking for His forgiveness.. asking Him to renew my living well with His water of life, to quench my thrist & refresh my strength daily.. i seek for His help, asking Him to help me to stay in His presence always, helping me to trust in Him wholeheartedly.. i began to pray that every Word that i meditate will adhere in me... i asked Him to equip me with His armor that i knew, but failed to put on.. soon, i began to feel the peace that has long gone.. buried my the abundant stress... thank you God!
today, in church as one of the leaders said, "to leave behind sins, actions, whatever that are in us in 2005, & not bring forward into this year".. immediately, i felt that God is saying this to me... and i commit it quickly unto Him... really looking forward for this year, even with the exam load, i am asking God to increase my effectiveness & fruitfulness, to increase my sensitivity towards the oppportunities that He has laid before me... i just wanna expand & live life for Him, for it is through Him, i first have life.. He is asking, "I've place it at your front door... Do you wanna claim it?"... "God, i really want to... help me claim it!!!!!" this is my answer.
well, this is my new year's resolution.. to resolve to continue to do more God's work.. for it has the best fulfilment in life once His work is done... it is "the one" satisfaction that you will nvr encounter whenever you do other stuff... Lord, in you i will follow, & in you i will gain peace..
ok now.. wanna go watch my O.C. now.. & house.. lol.. see you guys.. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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